Thursday, September 12, 2013

Michelle Obama and Drinking More Water

Are folks opposed to drinking plain water or to Mrs. Obama?

A new White House initiative (well, at least the First Lady's part of the House) has begun, encouraging everyone to drink more plain water.  Even just a glass more a day, they say.  Not "Stop drinking anything else!" or "Get 60+ ounces of water a day!" or even "For your good and the good of the country, the NSA is tracking your beverage habits."

Drinking more water sounds nice - and it's not an obviously horrible thing.  There are evidently some mixed opinions still about how much difference a shift to plain water will make, but it's still not a bad thing to drink more water and less of other things, assuming you don't drink so much that you develop water intoxication (no, really, it's called dilutional hyponatremia and it's real).  But it's very rare and you have to add a LOT of water to throw off your electrolyte balance.  The danger of hyponatremia is significantly smaller than running with scissors, let's put it that way.

Granted, some might point to the numerous companies involved in this initiative who make a very nice profit selling us three cents of water for two to three bucks.  That's a very fair reservation to have about this campaign and definitely can engender some criticism.

But you may recall that Mrs. Obama has already stepped into a hailstorm of criticism from conservatives and some libertarians for her so very radical opposition to obesity.  Some folks found it outrageous that any First Lady would try to tell them what they ought and ought not do with their bodies. Never before in our history has a First Lady done such a thing! Never ever .. well, except for nearly all the First Ladies back to Eleanor Roosevelt.  Sure, Bess Truman liked to keep to herself and stay out of the spotlight, but every other First Lady has been an unabashed opponent of things like unemployment, illiteracy, malnutrition, alcoholism, obesity, bad posture, and probably even running with scissors.  This is despite the fact that any reasonable person knows that all of those things (and more) are every American's God-given rights, guaranteed by the Constitution.

But few First Ladies encountered the derision and hyperbolic frothing for their pet projects that Michelle Obama has.  The notable exception was Hillary Clinton's abortive attempt to stop baking cookies, like she loved to do, and had even gone to university to study up on, and become an extra-governmental health czar.  Also, as I recall, a lot of people in the late 70s and early 80s thought it odd that anyone in Washington, D. C., would actually be opposed to alcoholism.  Betty Ford got a little flack for that.

So, really - what does make obesity and chronic dehydration so sacred to reactionary conservatives?  What is it that makes the dogs bark so loud on this issue?

One thing I'd like to mention at this point - and I'm sure a number of you have noticed this as well - is that Michelle Obama is African American.  Even people who regularly start complaints with "Well, you know, it doesn't bother me in the least, but ..." have noticed this fact, even though it doesn't bother them in the least, and they have a lot of African American friends.  Or they would if any of them lived in their neighborhoods or went to the same country clubs or tractor pulls as them - pick your vector. In a New York minute ... they might eventually invite them over to the house.

With all that being said about eventually kinda welcoming people, I still get the feeling that Dale and Judy Whitebread wouldn't be at all happy if "one of those people" were to be so "uppity" as to suggest that maybe they're not be doing all they might to combat obesity and less-than-optimal hydration.  They might even get belligerent and express their outrage, frothing at the mouth while they complain.

Hopefully, though, if they find themselves parched, or if their throats get a little scratchy, they might take a few extra sips of water.  That's just a little suggestion from me.  Mrs. Obama didn't ask, commission, or otherwise authorize me to say it.  I'd hate to get y'all fired up again.

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